The top 10 crazy things that ISKCON members believeHanuman das
Srila Prabhupada came to the west and 1965. He brought Krishna consciousness with him.
And that Krishna consciousness was beautiful. However, after he left, his disciples turned this wonderful philosophy into an ugly, illogical mess. Krishna consciousness was stripped of his beauty to secure the position of the few enjoyers who wished to live a life bereft of any disturbance and challenges. The ones who were supposed to be keepers of Srila Prabhupada legacy twisted the sampradaya teachings so they continue to enjoy their hegemony. As a result, ISKCON currently no longer looks like a spiritual movement of happy people. The Gestapo mentality is lurking behind walls of ISKCON’s temples and can be felt in every conversation with brainless, fanatical members who are hopelessly entangled into it.
But how this change happened? As soon as Srila Prabhupada left this world, his movement was immediately hijacked by a group of 11 disciples. They very humbly presented themselves as the “chosen ones”, as the gurus who will continue the sampradaya, and they claimed it was Srila Prabhupada’s desire. But, as it turned out a few years later, Srila Prabhupada didn’t “select” anybody to continue the sampradaya. Because that is not how sampradaya works. A guru will almost never “select” a few disciples and leave others forever disqualified to continue the legacy. Srila Prabhupada was never “selected” by Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati to be a diksa guru. Rather, Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati told Srila Prabhupada to preach in the west, and that order included everything. Similarly, Srila Prabhupada told his disciples that every disciple who is following the rules can become a guru.
Disciple’s birthright to initiate
Srila Prabhupada said that every disciple can initiate:
Mohsin Hassan: How many swamis do you initiated, American? I’m speaking just on…
Prabhupāda: About ten.
Mohsin Hassan: You have ten swamis. And outside of swamis, what’s the lower…
Prabhupāda: Now, they’re competent. They can, not only the swamis, even the gṛhasthas, they are called dāsa adhikārī, and brahmacārīs, everyone can, whoever is initiated, he is competent to make disciples. But as a matter of etiquette they do not do so in the presence of their spiritual master. This is the etiquette. Otherwise, they are competent. They can make disciples and spread. (Room Conversation — July 18, 1971, Detroit)
Thus, we can see that the Gestapo movement by the name of ISKCON, where every disciple must select guru who is “authorized” by the corrupt administrative body was never approved by Srila Prabhupada. And sampradaya never worked like this in the past. Now, of course, if you think that one quote is not enough, look at this:
Prabhupada: So far designation is concerned, the spiritual master authorizes every one of his disciples. But it is up to the disciple to carry out the order, able to carry out or not. It is not that spiritual master is partial, he designates one and rejects other. He may do that. If the other is not qualified, he can do that. But actually his intention is not like that. He wants that each and every one of his disciple become as powerful as he is or more than that. That is his desire. Just like father wants every son to be as qualified or more qualified than the father. But it is up to the student or the son to raise himself to that standard.
Atreya Rishi: Yes, I understand.
Prabhupada: If you are incapable of raising yourself to the standard of becoming spiritual master, that is not your spiritual master’s fault; that is your fault. He wants, just like Caitanya Mahaprabhu said, amara ajnaya guru hana [Cc. Madhya 7.128], By My order, every one of you become a guru. If one cannot carry out the order of Caitanya Mahaprabhu, then how he can become a guru? The first qualification is that he must be able to carry out the order of Caitanya Mahaprabhu. Then he becomes guru. So that carrying out the order of Caitanya Mahaprabhu depends on one’s personal capacity. Amara ajnaya guru hana. (Room Conversation, 29 June 1972, San Diego)
We can see here that Srila Prabhupada said that spiritual master “may” designate some disciples and prevent others from becoming a guru. But Srila Prabhupada didn’t do it. Srila Prabhupada never gave a list of people who can’t become a diksa guru. Neither he gave a list of disciples who can become a guru. And he definitely never said that a group of disciples (GBC) can prevent others from becoming a guru. This guru authorization process was the first mistake done by the GBC and this mistake was very grave.
Every student is expected to become Acarya. Acarya means one who knows the scriptural injunctions and follows them practically in life, and teaches them to his disciples. …Keep trained up very rigidly and then you are bona fide Guru, and you can accept disciples on the same principle. But as a matter of etiquette it is the custom that during the lifetime of your Spiritual Master you bring the prospective disciples to him, and in his absence or disappearance you can accept disciples without any limitation. This is the law of disciplic succession. I want to see my disciples become bona fide Spiritual Master and spread Krishna consciousness very widely, that will make me and Krishna very happy. (Letter to Tusta Krsna, 2 Dec. 1975)
Again, Srila Prabhupada doesn’t mention any board approval or anything like that.
The dark intrusion
In the initial years, 11 disciples of Srila Prabhupada very humbly concluded that they are the only one humble enough to accept the position of guru. And nobody else could become a guru. They divided the Planet Earth into 11 zones and started enjoying pretty female disciples and golden toilet seats. But due to the grave offense of hijacking the movement, In a few short years, 10 of them fell down. Some of them escaped with money and pretty girls, and one was even decapitated.
As the zonal Gestapo charade started to fall apart, a new echelon of mini-gurus lead by Ravindra Svarupa also wanted a piece of the guru cake. Because, being an ISKCON guru brings you money and a comfortable life, but only under the condition that guru supply is limited. If As long as GBC mafia is able to keep the number of gurus relatively small, from 50 to 100, those gurus would be able to travel around, preach humility and renunciation, and receive the money in form of a donation from hundreds and thousands of disciples.
But, if a local preacher could initiate people himself, then he wouldn’t need to fly in a Jet Swami to initiate everybody. And that would drain the ISKCON swamp. Only people who are behaving properly would be traveling preachers. Sannyasis who would be renounced would be invited for spiritual inspiration. And current luxurious sannyasis with girlfriends and luxury apartments would die out. They would die out because real gurus would preach against them.
Maintaining the lucrative deviation
ISKCON’s administratively approved guru system is lucrative as we described in the previous section. But it can only work as long as all the gurus are to be silent about the corruption and deviations of other “approved” gurus. Therefore, before becoming a guru, a prospective candidate must sign a statement that he will not rock the boat. He will not preach against the GBC or other gurus. And if you are preaching the real truth, and exposing all the nonsense happening in the movement, you will not even be considered as a candidate for a guru position. So, the primary qualification for ISKCON guru is to be corrupt and to be spineless. “Corrupt” means that he will voluntarily remain silent about “guru authorization” deviation, he will remain silent about other gurus and all the nonsense that they are doing and for that silence, you will be compensated with donations given to him by his disciples and other retarded members of the movement. “Spineless” means you have to be comfortable to live in such a movement.
However, we should not exclusively blame GBC members and gurus for introducing this deviation. This deviation is actively supported by every member of ISKCON, except those tho are too retarded to understand what is going on.
The consequences of the “guru list” deviation
Many people think that the current guru system is “not so bad”. So, now I will mention the top 10 crazy things you have to believe as an ISKCON member.
But before, let us first summarize the main points of the ISKCON’s Gestapo puppy guru system. Every ISKCON member must believe in those points, otherwise, he is kicked out. So, here are the 5 commandments of the church of ISKCON:
- GBC body members are pure devotees.
- Only pure devotees can recognize other pure devotees and therefore GBC must approve new gurus.
- Everybody approved by the GBC as guru is purest of the pure and able to take you back home, back to Godhead.
- Both GBC members and gurus are devotees of the higher caliber, they are most humble, the most learned, and completely surrendered to instructions of Srila Prabhupada.
- GBC body and ISKCON gurus are the only ones who really understand the teachings of Srila Prabhupada, anybody who objects their rule, anybody who doesn’t accept them as authorities is an envious fault-finder, lowest of mankind, and a person to be avoided.
Once you accept the 5 commandments of ISKCON retarded ideology, you are a “genuine devotee”. but you must also accept the following crazy ideas, otherwise, you will never be accepted as the bonafide ISKCON member.
1. Eliminating people who don’t worship you is a sign of greatest humility
If by any chance you don’t agree with 11 zonal acarya, or if you don’t agree with current “spineless, corrupt, puppy” guru system, you are a daemon. You need to be killed, or as a very minimum, removed from a society of ISKCON members, because you can “pollute” others with actual truth.
In the past, numerous Srila Prabhupada disciples were removed from the movement because the disagreed with something. You can’t really disagree with anything done by the “chosen ones”, ISKCON gurus and GBC members. No debate is possible about anything done by any ISKCON “pure” devotee. As long as you disagree with the activities of any guru, you are automatically marked as an offender. You can start packing. And you can even get killed for your criticism, like whistleblower Sulocana das. However, pure devotees are by definition, the most humble.
If you don’t believe that eliminating all the people who question you is a sign of greatest humility, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
2. Blind seers are essential
You can’t really select any senior preacher as your guru. You need “Seers”. The Seers are GBC members. The really see the truth. The really see who is pure. Therefore, the Seers must approve every ISKCON guru. Srila Prabhupada didn’t really know that. 🤣🤣🤣 Srila Prabhupada didn’t know that we need Seers, but Seers are perfect followers of Srila Prabhupada because they adjust his teachings according to time and space.
But Seers have only one problem, they are blind. If you look at the ISKCON gurus, Blind Seers already selected 70 gurus who fell down. Everything looked good in the beginning, the Seers told spineless guru candidate: “You must sign this statement of never criticizing us, you can never criticize any gurus that we approved. And enjoy life, by your spineless preaching, you will get a lot of spineless followers.”
But, it turned out that you can’t really enjoy celebrity life and a lot of money if you don’t jump into bed with a pretty girl. And pretty girl you can’t have if you are a celibate monk.
Nevertheless, although they approved over 70 gurus which fell down, GBC members are still perfect. If you are interested in the historical data of fallen gurus, you can read my Guru list accuracy article
If you don’t believe that blind Seers are essential, you can’t be a member of ISKCON. It’s heresy to think that GBC members made a mistake in approving all the nonsense people to pose as gurus.
(spoiler alert: People who can’t even keep themselves in Krishna consciousness will not be able to guide others)
3. A fallen, dumb guru can take you back home, back to Godhead
In the last two decades of the 20th century, we have seen a lot of ISKCON gurus “approved”, and within few years, they left their posts just to be replaced by new gurus who would also fell down.
But the strategy is now changed, a fallen, dumb guru who speaks nonsense will be forcefully kept in the guru post. GBC will much rather ignore all the dumb nonsense done by gurus than to replace them. Thus, in ISKCON, we have two new terms: “Dumb guru” and “Fallen guru”.
So, there is a choice, when you are taking initiation, you can select a dumb guru, fallen guru or a supporter guru.
If you go through this website, you will find gurus eating mushrooms, gurus claiming that if we start wearing jeans, we can conquer the world. Gurus claiming that chanting japa comes from Vasco di Gama, that chaste, Vedic women were topless. Gurus blessing dogs, I mean I could go on and on.
But, if you don’t want a dumb guru, that is ok, you can select fallen guru, like sannyasi who travels around the world with his girlfriend, Sacinandana Swami. Of you like more like a grihastha-like sannyasi, you can select Giriraja Swami who lives with his girlfriend in a big mansion.
Or, you can select a supporter guru. This is the worst kind, he will never actually tell you what is wrong with the first two types of gurus.
If you don’t believe that Sacinandana “Loverboy” Swami or Giriraja “Mansion” Swami can take you back to Godhead, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
4. ISKCON is an intellectual movement
ISKCON has 100 000 Members worldwide. The number of ISKCON philosophical journals is zero. The number of public debates is zero. Disagreeing with authorities is a mortal sin, just like in Communist China. But, Srila Prabhupada wanted ISKCON to be an intellectual movement, Srila Prabhupada told his members to discuss things from various angles. But there are no various angles in ISKCON. Thinking is supposed to be done on the top. The rest of the corporate sudras will never debate anything important. Yet, those same ISKCON authorities consider themselves to be the greatest intellectuals, possessing the knowledge of the absolute truth. But if we look at how the movement is organized, there is nothing intellectual about it. Free speech in ISKCON is a joke.
Still, if you consider ISKCON to be a Gestapo tyrannical organization, you can’t be a member of ISKCON, you must accept it as the highest intellectual movement.
5. ISKCON leaders should be world leaders
Despite all the tyranny, all the concentration of money and power through guru licensing, you still have to believe that it would be the best thing for planet Earth if it would be ruled by GBC, aka Governing body commission. ISKCON members believe that ISKCON will continue to expand its influence and gradually take over whole countries. Although within their organization they don’t provide any opportunity for free speech, for disagreement, for debate, they think it would be somehow beneficial if “pure devotees” from the GBC would come in power. The whole world should embrace GBC tyranny which is currently implemented in their small organization.
If you don’t believe that ISKCON leaders are qualified to rule the world, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
6. Sexy is saintly
Even meat-eating religions don’t parade women prominently throughout the cities. No religion is doing that. But ISKCON is doing it. It’s called Indradyumna baba’s harinam party, and it is very spiritual. No ISKCON member ever challenged such behavior. I don’t even need to mention that Srila Prabhupada never did anything like that.
If you think that parading beautiful women throughout cities is not a spiritual activity, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
7. Working is for losers
If we look at ISKCON history, they didn’t do anything which would portrait them as hard-working people. ISKCON has zero Varna Asrama communities. Even the New Vrindavan community was not maintained through agriculture and cows, rather, it was maintained by sales counterfeit baseball caps.
Currently, the “model city” of Mayapur has no farms. All the vegetable and rice is purchased from outside.
In the last 50 years, ISKCON was able to establish a few restaurants, that’s all.
Additionally, ISKCON membership contains an unproportionally big number of psycho healers, horoscope readers, motivational speakers, and other types of essentially useless professions.
If you are a hardworking man and you like living a community of devotees, you will find it very hard to obtain that lifestyle within ISKCON.
8. Nitpicking is bliss
Since ISKCON is organized as a Gestapo machine consisting of puppy gurus who collect donations, and blind members who don’t see how they are being cheated, the level of discussion in ISKCON always remains intellectually undeveloped.
So, ISKCON members will constantly discuss worthless subjects and argue around irrelevant topics. The top echelon of ISKCON gurus is always followed by an army of small-time cheaters who will sell you “Vedic” services. For example, they will try to advise you on Vastu, claiming that your happiness depends on a new hole in your wall, also you need to change the position of your doors. Vastu expert advisor will cost you several thousand Euros. There will also be endless discussions around Vastu on Facebook.
Then, you need a horoscope guy who learned Jyotish in 2 months by reading one book called “Horoscope for dummies”. Then, horoscope “experts” will endlessly discuss with their followers about planets and their influences.
Every society also needs its enemies. Since retarded ISKCON members can’t understand that spineless gurus are the actual enemy, they need to imagine their enemy. So, ISKCON’s greatest enemies are vegans, because they don’t drink milk. And Srila Prabhupada said that milk required to develop finer tissues in the brain. Unfortunately, some other ISKCON members became vegans. Thus, there is always a war raging between vegan-devotees and milk-drinker devotees.
Although their guru is a sannyasi with a girlfriend, ISKCON member will somehow never notice this. Rather, they will debate should we eat tapioca for Ekadasi or not.
If your guru participated in the murder of Sulocana, that is not really worth discussing, but if you ate a tomato without offering it to Krishna, that is a terrible sin.
If you think that discussing global cheating performed by licensed gurus is more important than discussing vegan daemons, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
9. The money belongs to clouds
ISKCON is a movement with zero financial transparency. Sannyasi renunciants are collecting Big amounts of money every year, however, there is no public record on how the money is spent. And then, all of a sudden, after 10 years, we have a whole building in Mayapur where all the apartments were owned by renunciants.
ISKCON is like one big cloud, and when you throw your money in, you can’t really see where it ended up.
And, of course, questioning pure devotees what they did with the money is very offensive and it should not be done. Therefore, the best was to remain humble is to just throw the money in and don’t ask any questions.
If you believe in financial transparency, you can’t be a member of ISKCON.
10. Girls are naughty, boys are dandy
Despite all the fallen and dumb gurus, despite all the Gestapo mentality and lack of free speech, despite the lack of financial transparency, the boys from the GBC and ISKCON gurus have only one important topic to discuss:
There are some naughty girls who want to become female gurus. The problem is that Srila Prabhupada envisioned a sastra based social system with gender roles vastly different from today’s western society. Thus, ISKCON may look as “patriarchial” when looked from outside. And some puppy gurus really hate this, because it messes up with their income stream. Nobody wants to join and give money to patriarchial religion which only has male gurus. So, since puppy gurus don’t have any clue how Vedic society should look like since ISKCON anyway didn’t establish any model communities, they feel that pushing a feminist agenda will bring them more “acceptance”. They completely lost the idea that their life is meant to please Srila Prabhupada and Krishna, ISKCON doesn’t exist to please the public.
But, those who preach about “gender roles” and varna-asrama somehow always put emphasis on girls. Women are something that we need to fix. For example, some gurus push the idea that “women should not be gurus”. But every coin has two sides. If we want to have a Vedic society, we should have Vedic men also, not only Vedic women. Actually, if you have Vedic, strong men, women automatically fall in line. But ISKCON’s men are far from Vedic. So, if we really want to establish a Vedic society, men who are not responsible should not be put in leadership positions. For example, if somebody left his wife and children, such a person should not give lectures and hold any position of power in ISKCON. That is Vedic. But somehow, men have don’t want to fix men’s problems, they only want to work on women, to make them “really Vedic”.
In order words, they are trying to establish a society of chaste and shy women, and irresponsible men who are just like animals. I am afraid that will not work. Until we remove sannyasis with girlfriends, it is very hypocritical to prevent women from being gurus.
But, if you want to be really “Vedic”, you have to believe that girls are naughty, and boys are dandy.