Aparadha-pada Swami presents ISKCON advancement mantra

Aparadha-pada Swami presents ISKCON advancement mantra

We have ISKCON gurus, and we have ISKCON disciples.

Hare Krishna, my name is Aparadha-pada Swami, but disciples also call me Gestapopad. My most intimate disciples call me Offender-dev. I am often criticizing ISKCON, but I am also thinking about ways how to improve it. Here are my latest thoughts.

We have ISKCON authorities, and we have Jayadvaita’s ISKCON books, and we have ISKCON Gestapo lawbooks. We have ISKCON pedophiles, and ISKCON sannyasis with girlfriends. ISKCON brand is everywhere. Therefore, I suggest to implement the ISKCON mantra:

Don’t criticize, don’t criticize, criticize, crioticize, don’t, don’t.
Don’t think, don’t think, think, think, don’t, don’t.

I think this mantra is perfect, it perfectly allows ISKCON sannyasis to have girlfriends and to be gurus at the same time. But it also prevents anybody from criticizing them. I mean it solves the issue of changed books, it solves Hridayananda das Goswami’s theory that japa was brought to India by Vasco di Gama. And it also solves the Radhanath baba mayavadi problem.

Please chant one round of this mantra and try to spread it, and you will see that all a path will be opened for you to enter higher levels of ISKCON management. If you continue to preach this mantra for several years, you can even become mini-guru.

(This joke is courtesy of my friend from Zagreb who coined it on Croatian).